Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Back to School

This year is the first year I am not enrolled in school in 4 years. Before that, I did correspondence / a semester of college and before that, I was in high school. So needless to say, this September feels a little empty.

I am sure once October comes and everyone I know is freaking out in midterms and assignments and all I have to worry about is what my Nano novel will be about or if we have enough Halloween candy stocked up I will be fairly pleased. It's just that right now, I feel very strange.

I don't want to be in school at all. I never enjoyed school the way most people who pay six grand a year are supposed to. I don't really enjoy learning about things when I am expected to retain and regurgitate it. I have known for a while that I would not be able to go for my masters right away which without it renders my degree mostly useless. I don't even really know if I will ever go, for many reasons, including money, time, effort and my marks aren't good enough to even get in anyways. But, I can't say that I never will because in theory, having a masters would make me sound fairly smart - won't necessarily make me smart, but I could fool the masses.

So, all this to say is I don't miss school at all, but some how I still feel like I should be there.

Now, on the other hand, I started university two years later then most people do. I had been out in the real world for almost two full years before I stepped foot in a university classroom. Not only was I out of the high school frame of mind, but I had all kinds of crazy situations that had probably made me age ten years. Keep in mind, that I hate teenagers when I was a teenager and I think you can see the issue.

Going to school in first year for me, was like babysitting without getting paid. It was like I was stuck in a room of toddlers and for some reason was paying thousands to be there. Now, I do admit I am not the most mature person out there. Not even close. But having to spend the first month of my school year sitting in a giant auditorium behind ditsy blond ass holes who only talk about how awesome prom was almost killed me. I have problems paying attention. Classrooms are kind of the worst place for me to be in because the second someone is playing solitaire on their laptop in front of me I no longer care what the teacher says, so if the blond idiots who will never pass first year are constantly flipping through their skanky prom pictures my brain can do nothing except watch and think of snarky remarks.

Here is a small tip for teenagers entering University/college: If you want to look at pictures or play games, no one cares I promise. Just sit at the back. I don't know who you think you are kidding, but if you sit at the front and play pac man, people will see and then they can't focus. Also, get over prom. It happened, you were probably so drunk and it was so funny, but its over. Get over it.

Needless to say I am in a bad mood. As I walked to work this morning I saw a small fleet of Frosh week people standing in my way. This alone wouldn't be so bad, however they dared to start to sing Spice Girls. I know everyone loves the Spice Girls and that I have no right to claim them on behalf of my generation, but when you are not even old enough to have tried on platform sneakers when they were popular, please don't sing their songs at those who were. Or if you are going to sing their songs, at least sing them right because its offensive not to. They are an international treasure and deserve some respect.

But, teenagers as you enter university/college remember this one thing: Don't be an I.D.I.O.T. If you aren't going to pay attention in class, don't go. Unless attendance is marked and then go, but leave at the break.

This is a long ranty post about stupid teens. Hopefully if you are a teen and you are reading this, you will be less annoying to the people around you. but chances are if you made it far enough to this point you are not the ones I am talking about, you are probably one like I was who hates their own kind.

Good Luck at school young folks!

This is a picture of me infiltrating the I.D.I.O.T group and slowly burning them until they get less annoying.
Some call it torture, some call it operant conditioning.
Thank you Bachelor in Psychology for teaching me how to train people.
20 grand well spent.

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