Thursday, August 30, 2012

She Doesn't Want my Kidney... UPDATED

So I was emailing my friend today because her cell phone died and because she thinks its sneaky if she uses work-related titles so people will think we are productive. Well I think I ruined our lovely friendship.

She said something harmless about teaching the new person how to scan things (because I am trying to not scan the stupid binder because it will take 4 hours and its not even for my division so screw that) and this new person is that divisions admin. I then responded with some weird noises and other things that resulted in saying she will need to bail me out of jail with her black-market kidney money but that I would totally give her one of my kidneys after so it would be okay because we would be like weird kidney sisters. However my kidneys are hardly holding up for me so I am sure they aren't suitable, but I think she would be fine. She eats healthier then me so I bet the kidney would flourish and then mine would die and then I would have no Kidneys and turn yellow.

Or is that when livers die?  I don't know, Grey's Anatomy hasn't been on in a while and it got so stupid I never remember what happens just that I am upset with its terrible plot.

What was I saying? Oh right, so I think Crystal is afraid of me. She has only answered that she is concerned. Then I replied with something to the effect that this plan wouldn't work because she would need to heal from her kidney operation before coming to get me, and then by that point I would have stabbed the biggest and baddest person in jail because that's how you do. Otherwise you wont be the top dog and that wouldn't go well for me.

She hasn't answered me and I am concerned that she left to go find someone to take out her kidney in preparation to bail me out of jail.

Crystal: Plan didn't work out, new lady was busy. But I did get out of a four hour scanning job for today? So that's good.  You should probably keep your kidneys until my next jail-type fake emergency.

Today has been a very long day. I think I need to lie down. maybe from all the kidney blood loss, or maybe because I am panicking over my best friend hating me or having the funny farm coming to take me away. that's not funny Crystal... not funny at all.

PS: Sorry Crystal. You put up with a lot of weird. I hope your bosses don't read you emails.

PPS: This is the reply I finally got and it is obvious and clear proof of whay she is my best friend: I really don't want to go through unnecessary surgery, but if such an occurrence arises, I'll do whatever.

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